Wednesday, November 26, 2014

500lbs Is Really Heavy

Next time 2 grown former military retires tell me that a 500lb butcher block is heavy and I might need help unloading it...I'll listen.

Me, a woman over 18 by far, decides I can move and unload a 500# butcher block table onto our porch is really silly. Needless to say, I backed up my SUV, that the 2 military guys put the block into. It was in the right location so I started to pull it into the location to get it out of my car.

It began to roll and all 500# landed on my right hand between the first nuckle and middle nuckle. First thing I say, trying to stay calm to my 8 year old..

Honey can you move the car forward. To my 8 year old. Then I said, can you please open the door (that my have was pinned to). She unlocked it. I jumped backward and pushed her out of the way.

Needless to say...I have a bruise

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Fluffing in a closed car

Who ever said that girls "fluff" never talked to my 8 year old. She's the one that says "thank you" when you ask her to turn the fan on in the loo after it becomes malodorous. 

I have come to realize if your child can "DIRECTIONALLY FLUFF" it's not a good idea to be in a locked car with the windows locked in the up position. 

Unless you want to gagggg. 

Stabby the Goat

Okay...again...common sense. If you nickname a metal "tin art" goat with very sharp horns STABBY it might not be a good idea to put him somewhere that you might fall on him.

Walking out of my office from a patient with a brain injury...I am backing out to keep speaking with them and I brilliantly placed our Kid Toy box right next to my door. It is an antique carpenter's box. Oh yes it's pretty. With Stabby on top of it - it is also charming. 

I didn't realize, maybe I actually did but ignored it, but it is a death trap.

I am walking backwards out of my office and trip on the charming antique box, begin to fall and all I can think of is 
Stabby is Going to Kill Me. 
Must...Move...Body...Don't Get Gored by Stabby in the Lung or Kidney..

You think I should have known.

Needless to say...Stabby is now on top of my bookshelf and we replaced Stabby with softer African Elephant and took out his tusks. 

Caramel Apple's Shelf-Life

Okay. Who hasn't done this, please don't just say it's me. 

I was honestly surprised when I went into my pantry yesterday to find fruit flies. Why you ask???  Well I thought, or maybe didn't think about it at all, that the caramel apples I bought in early October for a company picnic were "shelf stable" never thinking they would rot sitting on a high shelf for almost 2 months. 

There were creepy bugs inside the plastic container and flies all over. I started screeching like a baboon and grabbed them, ran outside with shorts and no shoes (28 degrees mind you) throwing them in the rubbish. I them summarily took off my shirt and threw it away. There were 24 apples. 

My husband and daughter thought I had gotten attacked, but then couldn't stop laughing. 

I'm still grossed out! 

Friday, November 21, 2014

Hot Yoga and Cayenne Pepper DONT Mix

I have been doing hot yoga for several months and loving it! My body is kinda getting used to it and I am learning about how to be active. I am not hurt after hot yoga - actually I feel really good. 


However, one day I went to a very light and easy cold "Family Yoga" class. We do lions, worms, puppy partners and Run Around Yogi. It is a fun class where you can wear jeans and introduce your kids to yoga and have fun. I love the bonding and we do a snuggle savasana. Well, my daughter got too into it and jumped on me during a down doggie. Needless to say - my back, shoulders, legs and hips were killing me. The bonding is great, but I can't handle the pain.

So, after that pain I used some doTERRA Deep Blue Rub lotion for my aches and pains. It worked great. I was cold...I was hot...then normal and I felt GREAT. The areas I applied it to felt great, the areas I didn't apply it to still hurt. The next day I applied it to other areas. I still felt great, smelled like an herb factory and apparently as my husband so nicely said, "my granny's snuff". BUT I felt good. 

So I had all day long to feel good. I then head off to hot yoga at 530pm. I kept thinking...is the room 200 degrees only on my arms and back. No matter what I did, my skin was on fire. I rubbed it, added water to my towels to try and cool it down. Blew my cold breath on it. NOTHING! My skin was on FIRE. I couldn't wait to get out, but my pride wouldn't let me leave. 


Slowly I cam to realize that the Cayenne pepper in the blend of went to town on my skin. I finally figured out....if something has Cayenne pepper in it...go to hot yoga after it is on your skin - even if it is 15hours old. 

TAKE A SHOWER FIRST!!

NEVER eat 3 week old open humus that has been laying out.

I'm just saying!! Any more explanation needed? 

You would think that when I used a spoon to scoop it out or a cracker and I heard popping and lots of bubbles I would have had a clue.

You would think that when it hit my stomach and it tasted acidic I would have had a clue.


But no...I ate 1/2 of a pre-made tub.

I guess I deserved what I got!

Anyone for Lemon Basil Summer Hummus? Want some?


http://www.doctoryum.com/2014/08/lemon-basil-summer-hummus/ 
INGREDIENTS
1 can or two cups of chickpeas (save the liquid)
1-2 cloves of garlic
Juice and rind of 1 lemon
10-15 basil leaves
2 Tbsp. tahini
2 Tbsp. olive oil
¼ tsp. sea salt or Himalayan salt
Dash of black pepper
DIRECTIONS
Blend all ingredients (except the liquid from the beans) in a blender until smooth.  Use 1/2 to 1 cup of liquid to adjust the consistency of the hummus. Garnish with basil and olive oil and serve with your favorite fresh vegetables.